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I would argue that a Fleshlight is to sex what Taco Bell is to a Mexican banquet. Anti-feminists have resorted to review-bombing its Rotten Tomatoes audience score. It's hard to beat the good cheer brought about by your own hand. You just have to be comfortable with a Donkey Kong-esque barrel on your junk. This is Masturbation Cream. It's not really in the ballpark, and sure, some snotty people who think they're better than you will make fun of it.

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It's efficient, and at the end of the day, it does the job perfectly. What would those other things feel like if they were jerking your gherkin. Don't make me do this again. It's as simple as that. Has Started Doing On Its Own Artificial intelligence has been the bogeyman of science fiction since before it even existed for real. Just a cacophony of churning, rumbling gears, and actuators slouching along towards Jizzrael. The basic goal of a Fleshlight was to make a vagina into a handheld device. an idea that will get exponentially creepier the more time you devote to thinking about it.

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